P4A

       The question of “who do you want to be when you grow up” is one we have been asked—in increasingly serious fashion—since we were old enough to answer. At first our responses made our parents laugh, as we professed a desire to become a baker, football star, or in my case, an archaeologist. Yet as we grew, the question became more difficult to answer. We came home for Christmas break and found ourselves dreading that family member we haven’t seen in six months, asking what we plan to do with our major, or for that matter, what our major is this time around. I think about it all the time, more than is healthy, and I usually have a different answer prepared every time I am asked. But if I were ever asked what type of person I wanted to become, or how I wanted to be remembered, I would be brought up short. At this point, I can only answer in abstractions.
My hopes for my future self have changed drastically since coming to college. I think, like everyone else, I became so exposed to the plethora of points of view and ways of life that it was impossible for some not to sink in. What’s more, my experiences in this class have altered my outlook on life and the future drastically. Before, any goals for my future state of being were so rooted in my career plans as to be indistinguishable. For a very long time, I wanted nothing more than to be a musician, or otherwise become successful monetarily. I never gave any thought to my future beyond my plans for a job. It was a selfish outlook, one that I tried to mask behind a belief that somehow these dreams were unselfish.
I see life a bit differently now. My future is defined less in terms of career, as how that career will help benefit others. I simply, somehow, want to make a difference in the lives of the people around me. I can attain this ultimate goal through almost any career, great or small. If I can leave this world knowing I made a positive difference in the lives around me, I can leave fulfilled. That sounds like such a cliché remark. Who doesn’t want to make a difference? Sadly, few people ever get around to it. Hopefully I’ll be an exception.
       One area in which I hope to elicit change is in our tendency to pass judgment or hold some form of prejudice against others. I feel that society, as a whole, tends to be unaccepting of those mindsets or lifestyles they find alien. Especially in the South, where I was raised, the “Christian” community is generally close-minded and judgmental. Growing up in an environment such as this, I feel drawn to combat these habits. Judgment from a community that by nature should be accepting infuriates me. I do not know how my career or life can help to end this specifically within Christians, but I hope to be an example of acceptance and love to those around me, and maybe even to elicit change on a large scale. This could mean working in policy or law to help end inequality, or becoming a leader in whatever community I find myself a part: leading by example.
Another area in which I feel a strong pull to change is within the cancer community. Due to a few very personal experiences with cancer throughout my life, I’ve felt for a long time a desire to do something. There is no arguing that people are aware of cancer, yet it feels as if we are no closer to curing the disease than we were 20 years ago. I am no doctor or researcher, nor do I plan to be. So how can I help? I have chosen to do so, for now, through the Texas 4000 organization. I’ve chosen to raise awareness, funds, and knowledge for cancer research by riding form Austin to Anchorage, Alaska the summer after my sophomore year. Such a feat from this side of the ride seems insurmountable, but I feel extremely excited and blessed to be a part of the process, and to in my own way fight back. I feel as though I am standing up for those who cannot do so themselves, because they’re currently battling, or are already gone. I don’t yet know specifically how I will continue this fight once my ride is over, but I’m confidant an opportunity will present itself.

Although I feel that these goals are worthy, at times I lose sight of them altogether. I experience regularly what I felt the most after seeing Earthlings, a certain sense of helplessness. How can I in any way change the status quo, or benefit society? I’m one person. I can’t cure cancer or fight prejudice on my own. This is why the starfish story spoke to me so strongly, and gave me clear and strong motivation for my future.  I had heard it from my mother a few times before, yet hearing it at this time in my life carried a weight that previously hadn’t been present. I suppose it’s because the telling was no longer just theoretical: some distant future where I will make all the right choices. “Don’t you there are miles and miles of beach and hundreds of starfish? You can’t make a difference! . . Then, smiling at the man, he said . . . ‘I made a difference for that one.’” (Anthology 246)
       All of these personal goals for my future have seemed, for the past few years, to be leading me toward the study of law. I feel that through the obtaining of a law degree, I can achieve a vision for my future that would help me make a difference, fight judgment and prejudice, and aid those afflicted with cancer and other diseases. I could represent the interests of those afflicted, lobby for more medical subsidization of terminally ill patients. I could help end prejudice by working toward legislation legalizing gay marriage. I could fight for those who cannot do so otherwise. As is apparent, this dream leans toward law in a political sense. That may be in the cards, but I hope to elicit change either way.
With such an ambitious dream in mind, my decisions academically will play a major role in future success. You must do well in school overall to study law, but I feel that the majors I choose to complete will also impact my success in law radically. The writing classes I have taken and will take, including this class, will be tremendously helpful. Not only will they help me present myself in a sophisticated fashion in essays prior to entering law school, but learning to write effectively is invaluable to the profession. In law, the majority of one’s job lies in successfully making a claim, appealing to someone in a way that brings them to your side. One does this most successfully if they are well versed in rhetorical strategy. Effective writing is arguably one of the most important tools a lawyer possesses. Furthermore, my education through Plan II will broaden my awareness of others’ views, round me out as a student, and overall, teach me how to think. In Music Business, I will learn the ins and outs of the music industry, which will aid me in my goal of starting in copyright law and artistic or intellectual property. Not to mention that I will also be pursuing music, a personal passion. Added together, I hope my education at this University will give me the tools to succeed and set myself apart in the world of law. What’s more, the experiences I have here will help me become a grounded, confident human being, capable of wading through the marsh of modern society with ease. Hopefully, it will even eradicate that pesky perfectionism.
        After such an exhaustive explanation of my character and career goals for the future, I feel better equipped to assess my plans for the next three years at UT. Of course I plan to do well in classes, gain fulfillment from various organizations, and take full advantage of all the opportunities provided me here. Hopefully, I can maintain a fairly good GPA; at least well enough to get into law school. I will complete all of my requirements for Texas 4000, and finally get on that bike for Alaska. I know the ride will create countless memories I'll never forget. I'll maybe get cast in a few more plays, and enjoy the creative process with like-minded people. I'll perform in ensembles, pass my juries, and complete my degrees. I will stress, pull all-nighters, and live on caffeine, and ultimately graduate. But this is only half the reason I’m here. If that. College is the time in our lives where we are most free to explore, to lustily devour every challenge presented. It’s where we foster relationships that last a lifetime, and mold ourselves into the kind of person we wish to become. This has absolutely nothing to do with grades. I want to leave behind, for once, my constant, nagging worries for the future, the need to be successful, and truly live. To some, this goal may contradict all the others, but I see it as a requirement along with all the rest. In the past, I’ve forgone making memories for building résumés, and regretted it each and every time. So now, I want to climb a mountain, ride a mountain bike to Alaska, pub hop in London and swim naked in the ocean. Those experiences that make life beautiful and worth living should be my first priority. I will love, hurt, laugh, cry, break bones, and conquer the world. I want to become happy, fulfilled, wise, and learn to love life and its inhabitants. That is why I am here, and that’s my plan. The rest will just be a bonus.

WORD COUNT: 1584
WITHOUT QUOTES: 1547