When we feel stifled by the people and mentality surrounding us, it leadsto destruction of our inner selves and outward release of pent up agony. In
the Woman Warrior, the narrator, Kingston, is frustrated by her family and the pull of both American and Chinese culture on her life. As may children of immigrants feel, she cannot be defined by American nor Chinese lifestyles, and as such fits into neither category. She is also perpetually made to feel inadequate by her family for her adoption of American culture. As a result, Kingston goes through longs periods of time that she is virtually silent in public, and as much as possible draws no attention to herself. She becomes increasingly ashamed of the helplessness she felt during such times, and when she notices that one of her peers is acting in a similar fashion, grows to hate her and lashes out. "'Look at you, snot streaming down your nose, and you won't say a word to stop it. You're such a nothing'. . . Then I screamed, 'Talk!' (Kingston 176) The insults she hurls at the other, weaker girl mimic the way that Kingston views herself and her situation, and in her desperation she turns to hurting others to make herself powerful. The guilt she felt at her weakness manifested itself in cruelty, an action which only made her all the more helpless and distraught. So distraught, in fact, that she become sick for a year and a half.
guilt manifests itself in subconscious ways
Kingston's aunt Moon Orchid seems to face a similar inability to outwardly express herself. But rather than letting this out by exploding upon others, she has spent a lifetime keeping it held inside. She eventually becomes too weak to defend herself. When she goes, when forced by her sister, to confront her husband, she cannot bring herself to say a word to him. She relies completely on Brave Orchid to take care of her, and, as Kingston describes it, "Moon Orchid had misplaced herself, her spirit scattered all over the world." (Kingston 153) When faced with an alien culture, or a situation in which the options are fight or flight, Moon Orchid hides within herself. Kingston makes the same decision as a child, and will never forgive herself.
